A message for the newly engaged

Clint and I got engaged on June 20th and it has been grins from ear to ear ever since. And I hope that those who may be recently engaged or who may get engaged in the future have an incredible experience, just as we have thus far. But I also have a message for those who fall under this category: be kind when speaking about your day to others who are also planning their day (or who have already HAD their day).

Nothing is worse or could possibly be more offensive than a constant comparison. When speaking to someone who is planning THEIR special day, remember that it is exactly that: THEIRS. It's not yours. It really has absolutely nothing to do with you. So when they are excited about something that you may have a different opinion on...keep your mouth shut. And do nothing other than be happy for them. If a couple thinks it's more important to spend the extra money on catering and let other things take a back seat, but you're someone who would rather spend your money on the perfect dress...guess what? THAT'S OKAY. Drop the judgmental 'tude and simply be HAPPY for them.

It's also okay if a couple would rather get married on the side of the road and not spend THOUSANDS AND THOUSANDS of dollars on one day. It's THEIR day. It's THEIR story. And they can choose to celebrate it however they please.

You should also keep all of this in mind if/when you attend a wedding ceremony or reception. Leave your judgments at the door and simply be present for this incredible event that you should be honored to have even been invited to in the first place. Not a fan of the color scheme? Guess what...it's not your wedding! "Oh...I definitely would've chosen a different design for the dress". Guess what...it's not your dress! These two people have chosen to commit the rest of their lives to each other and that is the center (or should be) of a wedding celebration anyway. Your opinions of what you would change or do differently...they do not matter and have no place in their special day.

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I say all of this because I have experienced some of it since we've started planning. And to have someone bash a choice you've made in regards to the biggest day of your life...it's not fun. Why can't we all just be kind? And recognize that we're not all the same...and that's a WONDERFUL thing? That's how I try to approach every conversation, in general, and especially in regards to wedding planning. Provide encouragement, support and enthusiasm, not feelings of guilt or a cause to second-guess.

I also say all of this as a reminder to myself (and other brides-to-be). A reminder that this day is all about the two of you, as a couple, and what is most important to you. I find myself making some decisions to please other people; to make sure that the day is a blast for THEM. And then I have to remind myself that this day is not about THEM. It's about us. It's about our lifelong commitment to each other and how we would like to celebrate that. Everyone else's happiness is just icing on the cake.

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A simple reminder to be kind first and to think twice before you speak.

XOXO,

Unapologetically blog

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A place to be #unapologeticallyme